Hi Lily,

I am not sure what you mean by mixed emotions, but I will try to give you an answer that I hope will be helpful.

I am going to assume that you are referring to what therapists call ambivalence, when someone has a range of emotions about a situation. An example might be when you are facing a change in life, like a job change, and you feel that it is good in some ways, not so good in other ways, and just plain scary. If this were the case, probably a lot of feelings might come up — excitement, fear, sadness, and others. You might describe yourself as being ambivalent, unsure as to how you really feel. If you had mixed feelings about a decision you had to make, it would probably be difficult to make the decision.

When you have mixed feelings, it can really help to sit down with yourself and a sheet of paper. Write down each of the feelings you are experiencing. And then, after each feeling, write down what you think is causing that feeling, or what images you connect with that feeling. This can help you to sort out your feelings, and get a better sense of what's going on in your mind as you evaluate the situation. You might decide that some of your feelings are based on thoughts that aren't very rational, while other feelings are the result of thoughts that you need to consider further.

The key to dealing with mixed feelings is to sort them out, taking a look at one feeling at a time. Otherwise, we have a tendency to kind of turn things into mud, and that doesn't help at all.

Talking with a therapist about your mixed feelings, gaining an objective perspective and some assistance sorting out your feelings, is something I would also recommend.

Now, if by mixed emotions you are referring to extreme highs and lows, back and forth between super excitement and super depression, then that is another issue altogether. That is definitely something to talk to a mental health professional, especially a psychiatrist, and as soon as possible.

Lily, it's nice to see you. Take good care of yourself, my friend, and stay in touch with us!


Answered By Answered by Dr GaryCA
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